


Rainy Days, Warm Hearts

by Roblidon



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst, Depression, Egobang - Freeform, Happy Ending, M/M, prompts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-29
Updated: 2016-05-29
Packaged: 2018-07-11 00:00:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7013965
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Roblidon/pseuds/Roblidon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After holding himself together for so long, Dan finally breaks down. Luckily, Arin comes to pick him back up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rainy Days, Warm Hearts

**Author's Note:**

> Requested by an anon. It was raining earlier and I got the sudden urge to write this. When I'm upset, or having a breakdown, or having a panic attack, I repeat things a lot. That came through in this piece a lot. Leave me a comment or shoot me a message on tumblr. I'll be back to the normal fluffy stuff soon, I promise.

Dan sits in the park, knees pulled up to his chest, hands clasped loosely together. He hears thunder in the distance, and the sky darkens more and more with each passing moment. He looks up, his eyes dull and tired. The clouds are moving quickly, a sharp breeze cutting through the thin fabric of his shirt. He sits in silence, listening to the wind as it moves through the trees.

The first few drops of rain start to fall, sending streaks down his face and making his hair heavy. He doesn’t move, doesn’t try to find cover. He sits in silence, listening to the rain, listening to the world around him. He sits in silence, wind picking up speed all around him, thick drops of rain hitting his arms, his face, soaking into his shoes and making him shake with the chill of it. He sits in silence, the weight of the world on his shoulders, and he starts to weep.

He puts his head in his hands, his whole body still shaking from the cold. He sits in silence, his tears mixing with the rain, hardly noticeable. A flash of lightning splits the sky, not quite far but not quite close. He takes no notice, just shakes his head, pressing his palms against his eyes, trying to stop himself from having a complete breakdown, but it’s too late for that now. Thunder follows a few seconds later, starting out as a low rumble and then quickly gaining in volume, the sound almost right above where Dan sits. As the thunder gets louder, a sob escapes his lips, followed by another, and another. His quiet weeping turns to uncontrollable sobbing, his whole body shaking even more now, not just from the cold.

He can’t hold himself back anymore. He’s been able to keep these dark feelings at bay for so long. He’s been able to live a normal God damn life for so God damn long. And now here he is, in the middle of a park, in the middle of a thunderstorm, in the middle of a breakdown. His mind is going a thousand miles an hour, sense and reason trying desperately to take back control from the negative thoughts, from the insane theories that they’re planting in his brain, going back and forth and back and forth and back and forth.

_You’re a nuisance_. _You’re wanted_. _You’re worthless_. _You have so much valu_ e. _You’re a failure. You’ve had so much success_. Back and forth in his head, making him ache physically and mentally and emotionally. He clutches his knees tighter against his chest, trying to stop the shaking and calm his breathing. It doesn’t help, and after a few seconds he gives up, allowing himself to fall backwards, his body hitting the wet grass like a ton of bricks. He opens his eyes slowly, his vision clouded by the rain and his tears. The rain is even heavier now, coming down in sheets. He’s soaked to the bone and numb from the cold. He brings his hands back to his face, pressing the heel of his hands into his eyes. _Stop crying, you’re a fucking grown ass man. Stop being so weak._ He tries to push the negative thoughts out of his head, pressing down harder on his eyes. He lets out a yell, full of anger and sadness and desperation. After a few seconds, his arms fall from his face, falling heavily to his sides.

All the fight in him is gone now. He doesn’t even have the energy to cry anymore. He keeps his eyes open, looking up at the shifting gray clouds, the rain leaving blotches in his vision. He sits in silence, and feels utterly defeated. Thunder continues to roll around him, creating a thick blanket of sound.

During the brief moments between each clap of thunder, he thinks he hears something else. A small sound, not quite far but not quite close. He can’t quite make out what it is, and he doesn’t have it in him to really investigate. Each time, though, the sound gets a little louder, a little closer, a little clearer.

_Dan!_

It sounds like someone calling his name. It must be a trick of his imagination. _No one cares where you are. No one cares about you enough to come look for you._

_Dan!_

It’s almost definitely a voice, he thinks. Even if it is, why would someone be calling _his_ name? He didn’t tell anyone he was coming here, so why would someone be here looking for him?

“Dan! What’re you doing? It’s not safe out here, dude.”

Dan looks to his side and sees Arin standing there, holding a large black umbrella, although by the looks of it, it really isn’t helping much. Arin’s clothes are soaked and his hair is sticking to his face, which is full of concern. He’s looking at Dan with such genuine affection and worry, it hurts Dan’s heart. He doesn’t know what to say, so he just stares at him, his eyes dull and tired. He sits in silence, but not for long. Arin grabs his arm, pulling him up from the ground. He sometimes forgets just how strong Arin really is.

“You weren’t answering your phone so I got worried. I know you come here sometimes when you’re upset but I was hoping you wouldn’t just be out here when it’s pouring like this. What’s going on, man? Are you alright? Did something happen?”

Arin sounds a little frantic, asking too many questions too quickly for Dan to really comprehend. Arin doesn’t take any time to wait for a reply, instead wrapping one of his arms around Dan’s midsection, leading him back towards the front of the park. Dan doesn’t say no, doesn’t say anything. He walks in silence, knowing that Arin is trying to talk to him but not having the energy to really listen or respond.

In a few minutes, they’re in Arin’s car, and he’s driving them… somewhere. Dan keeps his head down, his eyes staring at the floor mat, but he’s not really looking. He’s not really doing anything. He sits in silence, barely able to keep himself sitting upright. He’s so exhausted, so drained. He doesn’t feel like he’s actually moving. He doesn’t feel much of anything at all.

After what could have been a few minutes or a few hours, Arin parks the car. He walks over to the passenger side, unbuckling Dan’s seatbelt for him and lifting him out of the seat. Arin ditches the umbrella, instead using both arms to keep Dan standing and walking. They’re at Arin’s house, and in a few seconds they’re in his bedroom. Arin takes off Dan’s shirt and jeans, leaving him clad in his underwear for only a brief second before he replaces them with one of his own shirts and some pajama pants. He gets a hair tie and ties Dan’s dripping hair in a loose bun so that it’s out of his face. Dan doesn’t even know at this point if Arin has said anything to him since they entered the house.

Arin guides him to the bed, putting a thick blanket over him. He climbs into the bed next to him, wrapping one arm around his shoulders and pulling him in close. After a few seconds, Dan can feel himself warming up. He begins to feel sensation in his fingers and toes again, and he curls them a few times, testing them to make sure they still work properly, the renewed blood flow clearing his foggy mind up a little. He can feel Arin’s chest vibrating, and he hears him humming a tune, something familiar, and it’s incredibly comforting for some reason. He closes his eyes, allowing himself to fully warm up before he tries to say anything.

“Arin I-”

“It’s ok, Dan. You don’t have to say anything. I understand. I’m here for you, and of course I’ll listen to you, but for now you need to rest, ok? You must be exhausted.”

Dan looks up at Arin, and Arin meets his gaze. His dark brown eyes are so full of compassion it would have brought tears to his eyes if he wasn’t so dehydrated. He knows that Arin is right, and is glad that he’s here for him. He closes his eyes again, taking everything in. The smell of lilacs from the fabric softener on the blanket, Arin’s cologne, the sound of Arin’s breathing, the beat of his heart. He takes a deep breath, and slowly starts to feel a little more like himself again. The dark thoughts are gone, and are replaced by something else, the same thing repeating over and over in his head to the beat of his best friend’s heart.

_You are loved_.


End file.
